Computer Laws
Computers Laws
If a program is useful, it will have to be changed.
Every non- trivial program has at least one bug
Corollary 1 - A sufficient condition for program triviality is that it have no bugs.
Corollary 2 - At least one bug will be observed after the author leaves the organization.
Bugs will appear in one part of a working program when another 'unrelated' part is modified.
The subtlest bugs cause the greatest damage and problems.
Corollary - A subtle bug will modify storage thereby masquerading as some other problem.
Lulled into Security Law
A 'debugged' program that crashes will wipe out source files on storage devices when there is the least available backup.
A hardware failure will cause system software to crash, and the customer engineer will blame the programmer.
A system software crash will cause hardware to act strangely and the programmers will blame the customer engineer.
Undetectable errors are infinite in variety, in contrast to detectable errors, which by definition are limited.
Adding manpower to a late software project makes it later.
The documented interfaces between standard software modules will have undocumented quirks.
The probability of a hardware failure disappearing is inversely proportional to the distance between the computer and the customer engineer.
A working program is one that has only unobserved bugs.
No matter how many resources you have, it is never enough.
Any cool program always requires more memory than you have.
When you finally buy enough memory, you will not have enough disk space.
Disks are always full. It is futile to try to get more disk space. Data expands to fill any void.
If a program actually fits in memory and has enough disk space, it is guaranteed to crash.
If such a program has not crashed yet, it is waiting for a critical moment before it crashes.
No matter how good of a deal you get on computer components, the price will always drop immediately after the purchase.
The speed with which components become obsolete is directly proportional to the price of the component.
Software bugs are impossible to detect by anybody except the end user.
It is axiomatic that any spares required will have just been discontinued and will be no longer in stock.
If a circuit requires n components, then there will be only n - 1 components in locally-held stocks.
A failure in a device will never appear until it has passed final inspection
The best way to see your boss is to access the internet.
Or...
No matter how hard you work, the boss will only appear when you access the internet.
The hard drive on your computer will only crash when it contains vital information that has not been backed up.
If a program is useful, it will have to be changed.
Every non- trivial program has at least one bug
Corollary 1 - A sufficient condition for program triviality is that it have no bugs.
Corollary 2 - At least one bug will be observed after the author leaves the organization.
Bugs will appear in one part of a working program when another 'unrelated' part is modified.
The subtlest bugs cause the greatest damage and problems.
Corollary - A subtle bug will modify storage thereby masquerading as some other problem.
Lulled into Security Law
A 'debugged' program that crashes will wipe out source files on storage devices when there is the least available backup.
A hardware failure will cause system software to crash, and the customer engineer will blame the programmer.
A system software crash will cause hardware to act strangely and the programmers will blame the customer engineer.
Undetectable errors are infinite in variety, in contrast to detectable errors, which by definition are limited.
Adding manpower to a late software project makes it later.
The documented interfaces between standard software modules will have undocumented quirks.
The probability of a hardware failure disappearing is inversely proportional to the distance between the computer and the customer engineer.
A working program is one that has only unobserved bugs.
No matter how many resources you have, it is never enough.
Any cool program always requires more memory than you have.
When you finally buy enough memory, you will not have enough disk space.
Disks are always full. It is futile to try to get more disk space. Data expands to fill any void.
If a program actually fits in memory and has enough disk space, it is guaranteed to crash.
If such a program has not crashed yet, it is waiting for a critical moment before it crashes.
No matter how good of a deal you get on computer components, the price will always drop immediately after the purchase.
The speed with which components become obsolete is directly proportional to the price of the component.
Software bugs are impossible to detect by anybody except the end user.
It is axiomatic that any spares required will have just been discontinued and will be no longer in stock.
If a circuit requires n components, then there will be only n - 1 components in locally-held stocks.
A failure in a device will never appear until it has passed final inspection
The best way to see your boss is to access the internet.
Or...
No matter how hard you work, the boss will only appear when you access the internet.
The hard drive on your computer will only crash when it contains vital information that has not been backed up.
posted by Yatri at 12:16 AM
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